Tigers

by Jacob Earl

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about

Official debut solo album from Jacob Earl, originally released on CD in 2002. Lofi bedroom recordings about love and longing.

credits

released May 9, 2002

Jacob Earl - all sounds.

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about

Jacob Earl Ottawa, Ontario

Independent DIY queer producer/songwriter/photog.

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Contact Jacob Earl

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Track Name: 24 Views of Mount Fuji
seasons followed one another
we always swallowed one another
no matter how big the lie

I’m doing dishes for your mother
I’m moving furniture for your father
no matter how hard i try

i couldn't sew the tear together if i wanted to
even in the moments of disorder, i still wanted you... oh

standing at the bottom
we were all tightly knit together
bit by bit
you all disappeared from the picture

reason came to replace passion
and you got obsessed with the fashion
and colour turned to black & white

you're out of focus & receding
and this film is proceeding
with or without the dialogue i write

i couldn't put the moments in order if i wanted to
it's not a question of whether i wanted to...

standing at the bottom
we were all tightly knit together
bit by bit
you all disappeared from the picture
Track Name: Gills
I breathe in the dirt
through these worn out carbon filters
I've got my health
I've got my money and my looks
That every important catchy hook

I've got my gills
I'll take you down to ocean

Spend days and days and days and days and days
Doing nothing but breathing undercover
When we finally emerge
We'll be in love with one another

I crawl on all fours
Through these mud-soaked halls and corridors
I've got my wealth
I've got my honey
My crooked smile
That ever important guile
I've got my gills

I'll take you down to the parking lot
We'll play on the concrete
Get the grit on our hands
Get as scraped up as we can

Spend days and days
Spend days and days and days
Doing nothing but breathing undercover
When we finally emerge
We'll be in love with one another
Part of one another

Spend days and days and days (we'll be part of one another)
Doing nothing but breathing undercover
When we finally emerge
We'll be in love with one another

With these mud soaked gills
I've got my health
I've got my drugs
I've got my pills
I've got my gills
Track Name: Tigers part I [Idios]
We were driving down
You at the wheel
I'm doing the rolling
And everything's in slow motion

The idioms were bounced around
The voices get lost in the crowd
Summer guests that came and went
In this small midtown apartment
What did it all amount to?
What did we count on?
What did we count on?
What did we count on?
What did we count on?

The idioms were bounced around
The voices get lost in the crowd
Maybe something happened for once
Turned around and see that you had made a difference
Maybe something happened for once
Turned around and see that you had made a difference
Maybe something happened for once
Turned around and see that you had made a difference

We were driving in a summer storm
Me at the wheel
You doing the sparking
Now check the battery's fine
Track Name: Tigers part II [Tigers in Edgartown]
I totally understand
When you talk about that moment
It's a lot more important
Than sleep or food sometimes

Why I stayed up to morning
For three days straight
I had to get it
I had to get it just right
Coffees, muscles, drug trips
Too many late nights

Perfect moments come and sleep be damned
Mind you wanted this too, and don't deny it

I think I would
I think I would marry you
Tigers in Edgartown
I'd be there too

Sometimes you had a secret wish
You told me you wanted to be completely oblivious

I did not see the ocean
'Til 1998
Before I met you
We would have to wait

Come in the clouds
Displace all my fears
Whisper those mindless
Philosofuck words in my ear
Track Name: Athoos
Well ain’t you always egging me on?
How you come around lately a lot,
With your fake plastic smile
And penchant for denial
After being gone away for so long

And don’t you always look like the innocent one?
The innocent one
Did you paint on that demeanor With your blush and eyeliner?
It shows
Oh trust me, it shows
In how easily it comes and goes for you

When the telephone sat quiet
Far too long
How I stared at the buttons
And thought maybe I was the one
Who did something wrong?

And finally saying goodbye
Finding this emotional high
Was as hard as it was easy
To separate the truth from all of your lies

Oh how you lied – lied so well
And I couldn’t guess any better than you could tell
The truth if you tried

If you tried hard enough, you still couldn’t turn back time
I’m not interested in knowing what could have been
If you’d have only changed your mind
Track Name: Laydown
Everyone lay your bad intentions down
Everyone operates the same way
Operator has cut the lines
Deadened the airwaves
Maybe in this silence
We will hear ourselves think

Tragically it's not so cut and dry
For every rule I follow
It's cuz I've already broken it
A hundred times before
Curious perserverence
The disease is non-invasive
It simply makes you lie down and die
It simply makes me a slave to the grind

Mr and Mrs this is your life
2.5 kids and a divorced wife
Tragically, this is what you wanted
Your shit-eating smiles cannot tell a lie
Mr and Mrs this is your life
Tragically this is what you wanted

Everyone lay their intentions down

Everyone lay your bad intentions down
Everyone operates the same way
Operator has cut the lines
Cut the lines away
Dead is the airwaves
So maybe our hopes could stay
Maybe we'll all start talking again
Your shit-eating smiles don't have to go away
Track Name: Lily
Tar taste on your lips
They are quiveringing quickly
Every second that I think of you
Lily white in black
Only the faintest hint
That you're only even there

Traces down your back
Tells me a story
About how you feel about yourself
And how you feel about me
As if I wouldn't know

Lily white in your mind
Only as different
As you every described
Lily soft as your skin
Only as sweet as cinammon
And that doesn't even give it
Justice

How you feel about me
As if I wouldn't know
Lily
Oh, Lily
Lily
Lily
Track Name: Eye
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder
And I said beauty is in the eye of the beholder
And I said beauty is in the eye of the beholder
I see right through you
I wanna scold you
I go right past you
I wanna run back to you
These legs are tired
From walking too far for you
I said beauty is in the eye of the beholder
And I said beauty is in the eye of the beholder
Beauty
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder
I said beauty is in the eye of the beholder
(I wanna hold you)
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder
Can I take you
Can I take you far away from this?
Will you give me just one kiss?
I can see right through you
I pass you
I want to run back to you
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder
Track Name: Thruthevines
Creeping thru the moonlight and vines
All you see's your smile
Shed all these confines
File it under "don't ever read this file"

Creeping thruthevines

Met in the gutter last night
Somewhere between melancholy
And final fantasy
Maybe not in real life
But definitely our reality

It's definitely reality

Somewhere across the ocean
But closer than these creeping vines
Where did we open up to the notion
That we're giving each other signs?

Creeping thru the moonlight and vines
We found each other in each other's arms
And don't everything seem just fine?
Was there cause for alarm?

Somewhere across the ocean
But closer than these creeping vines
Where did we get the notion
That we're giving each other signs?

Creeping thruthevines
Track Name: Ourstory
Slowly is everything moving by
But I don't mind
No I don't mind
I think maybe I like
Being the one
Who's left behind

After all this time
I still don't know why
She's flown a thousand miles
For every one
That I've walked

Told a thousand stories
For every word
That I've talked
She'll fly thousands more
For me
For me

Our story here, now

It's raining

And everything's a story
We met along the border
She took my hands in hers
And we walked back home
Lay for awhile
Talked about the trip here
Smoked a joint and
Fooled around
Yes, we listened to some jazz
Got a little too fucked up
For our own good
And when it all came apart
Clothes strewn off
Walls were down
Slowly is everything going by
But I don't mind

Our story is here
Our story is now
Our story is here
Our story is now
Our story is here
Our story is now

It doesn't ever stop, no

Our story is here
Our story is now
Our story is here
Our story is now
Our story is here
Our story is now
Our story is here
Our story is now
Track Name: On a Hunch
It's your mission
Based on loosely drawn-out plans
And everything fits, nicely
As long as we're relaxed

You don't have time for me
The goals are quite clear
And all the things we went together
We have little to fear

On a hunch
I'd say we're doing just fine
I'll scratch your back
If you scratch mine

It's a shame
It's a shame
We had to go sour
We went so well together
Like sugar and flour

The might-have-beens
Are no use to us now
We both know what could have been
But neither of us knew how

On a hunch
I'd say we're doing just fine
I'll watch my back
If you watch mine
Track Name: All of it's Made up
She's waiting for the answer
It's a long time coming
Yeah she's waiting for the answer
And I can't even speak

Oh she's waiting for the answer
She's in the very wrong place
There's nothing to say
It's only a face

And all of it's made up
And all of it's made up
And all of it's made up

It ends just ok
From nothing to words
It stops, becomes something
They were just waiting
None of it hurts

She's still waiting for the answer
There's still nothing there
And if she ever got her answer
Would she still be there?

And all of it's made up
And all of it's made up
And all of it's made up

And all of it's made up
And all of it's made up
And all of it's made up

And everything's quiet
But a big loud mess
And suddenly it's quiet
And everything's a mess

And everything's quiet
But everything's a mess
And everything is quiet
It's suddenly a mess

Everything's quiet
Everything's a mess
Everything's quiet and a mess
Everything's quiet / nothing makes sense

Nothing seems to make any sense
Everything's quiet and mess

It's all live action
All made up on the spot
None of it's choreographed
Track Name: South
Going South, oh yeah
I'm going South

Going South for winter
Travelled many miles together
All in my head
Left nothing behind
No

I'm going South

Now it's summer
And you are gone
Days quicken
But the sound gets long
Ring the chimes
To call you back
Ring the chimes
To call you back to me

I'm going back South
South
South
Going back South
Going back South
Going South
I'm going South

Now it's spring
And you are gone again
And there's rain
Falling down on me
It's falling
Gone for good
Kiss
Going South
Track Name: Trader
If you go to sleep tonight
And you wake up tomorrow
You may find yourself to be a stranger

If you don't hold on to your life
And cherish every detail
You just may find someone else taking over

Trader I have to win it back
And I don't even know how
Trader get it back on track
I won't suffer from what I know now

If you go to sleep tonight
And you wake up tomorrow
You may find yourself to be a stranger

If you don't hold on to life
Love every detail
Someone else'll just take it over

Trader I have to win it back
And I don't even know how
Trader get it back on track
I won't suffer from what I know now

Trader I have to win it back
Track Name: Tao
You were always connected
To your inner peace
When I got angry and ran head on into the wall
You somehow picked me up after the fall

You were always the Tao
And I was the Te
Somehow that got switched around
Between the night and day

You say go with the flow
You say wu sei
I say I’m too bound
By my need to stand my ground

Sometimes anger is the only way

You were always respected
In your inner circle
Track Name: Slumber
You said "come over,
We'll have a slumber party
We'll smoke a lot
And laugh at things not funny"

So I packed up my bags
And made you a CD
Something so you'll always think of me
Something so you will always think about me

Waking up beside you was beautiful
Wanting this was totally new
You told me:
"We are not machines
We are warm bodies
We slumber through the time we should be talking"
Track Name: Goodnight / Heartbeatmotion
You're only clawing at the walls
Cuz someone told you up was better
You need to come back down
There's nothing more home than this bed on the floor
We made a spaceship of our sheets
Fuck the captain's fleet
We're going off on our own adventure

Goodnight
Goodnight

The stars are homing in now
We watched them dance from dusk 'til daylight
Finally fell aslumber
The sheets are all asunder
Finally fell aslumber

Goodnight
Goodnight
Goodnight
Goodnight

You're only clawing at the walls
Cuz someone told you up was better
You need to come back down
There's nothing more home than this bed on the floor
We made a spaceship of our sheets
Fuck the captain's fleet
We're going off on our own adventure
Fuck the captain's fleet
We're going off on our own adventure
Fuck the captain's fleet
We're going off on our own adventure

Goodnight
Fuck the captain's fleet
Goodnight
We're going off on our own adventure
Goodnight
Fuck the captain's fleet
Goodnight
We're going off on our own adventure

...

You belong in a heartbeatmotion
Sailing the ocean
With your conquistador

The fair ferry's fare is fair, fairies everywhere
Make sure we safely get to the other shore
The other shore

Billions of years ago
I was a cell
I learned to walk and talk
By living through hell
You belong to a heartbeatmotion
You belong sailing the ocean

Just a week ago
You were in a coma
I woke you up
From under your spell
You belong in a heartbeatmotion
You belong
Under my spell

Today I called it quits
I don't like the way that sits
Today I called it quits
I don't like the way that it sits

You belong in a heartbeatmotion
You belong sailing my ocean
You belong in a heartbeatmotion
You belong under my spell